Thursday, September 30, 2010

The Value of Having Good Sister-Friends in Your Life

Growing up as an only child I never longed to have sisters because what I saw from the women around me who had sisters was a lot of drama.  Someone wore someone's clothes; someone likes someone else's boyfriend; "mom likes you better", blah, blah, blah.  Me?  I had my mother's love all to myself, I got pretty much anything I wanted (which I found out later in life is not always the best thing); and I was spoiled beyond rotten by my grandparents. 

I also never saw the need in having sisters because as an only child, you tend to get adopted by friends with large families.  Growing up in the projects in Brooklyn, NY in the 80's and early 90's wasn't a scary time, as most might think, it was really more of a sense of community.  Everyone looked out for everyone else.  You could stay out to play as long as there was a responsible adult outside or until the street lights came on, whichever came first.  People sort of took a special interest in me because I was a latch-key kid as my mother worked very long hours to make a better life for us.  So I had a host of big sisters, brothers and surrogate mothers making sure that I was taken care of when my mom was working.  While I don't think I took those relationships for granted, I don't think I appreciated the way they helped to form my life.

However, as I grew older, I begin to learn the value of having true "sisters" in your life, women who love you unconditionally, flaws and all.  One of the friendships I value the most is the one I have with my best friend Rockelle.  We've been friends for over 20 years (ever since I gave her an extra minute when I was administering her typing test, which goes to show you how long ago that was because who takes typing tests anymore??!!).  Rockelle is the Louise to my Thelma.  Where my personality is outgoing and gregarious, she tends to be more quiet and reserved; where I tend to say what comes to my mind, she will be more thoughtful and careful in her responses to people.  While I'm an open book, most times, she is very guarded (I often tell her that she is a mystery wrapped inside of an enigma).  Somehow, you wouldn't think these personalites would mesh, but they do.  I think it works because we allow each other to be who we are meant to be, also because she stays clear of me during Yankee games and I return the favor when the Jets are on, and when she hasn't eaten (she is rough when she is hungry!).

So, okay I have Rockelle and that's all I need, right?  Wrong!  I use to say that I have all of the friends I need in my life and then along came these amazing group of women who have become the sisters that God intended for me to have.  They are Tonya, Gail, Tracy and Yvette.  They each add to my life in ways that challenge me to be a better person.  From Tonya's caring heart and endless amount of support to Gail's warmth and loyalty; from Tracy's wise and no-nonsense counsel to Yvette's encouraging and beautiful spirit, I can't imagine a life without them in it, and I thank God that He allowed our paths to cross.  What they also teach me is that you shouldn't be so quick to cut yourself off from people.  To allow people to love you and be there for you in good times and bad. 

I'm thankful that Rockelle, Tonya, Gail, Tracy and Yvette are my bedrocks of strength and I love them all beyond measure.  Men are nice and all, but they come and go.  Sister-friends are forever!

So, that's Taraztake for today, what are your thoughts?

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Where have all the qualified local radio D.J.'s gone?

A few months back I was listening to a popular radio station here in Charlotte and the host (whose return to the airwaves was given an incredible amount of fanfare that I still don't understand) began to report that he was hearing that R&B singer Bobby Brown had died.  Now he didn't say that the reports were confirmed, or he didn't even quote a news source, he was just talking about what he read on the internet and asked listeners to call in to the show and let him know what they had heard.  I was incensed!  I thought this was, at the very least, lazy and irresponsible, and I was embarrasd for this guy and the station who employs him.  Maybe I was wrong for thinking that anyone entrusted with such a large listening audience would care enough to have his facts straight before "reporting" this over the airwaves.

With the popularity of nationally syndicated radio shows that include Tom Joyner, Steve Harvey and the like, I'm noticing that you are hard pressed to find a good old fashioned local radio disc jockey, and it seems that the ones that are left are really just playing songs by request and coming up with inane contests so that people can win tickets to the latest show in town.  The other pet peeve I have here is that these d.j.'s tend to talk on endlessly about gossip and other foolishness.  Is this what they think we want? 

Maybe I'm the problem because I was spoiled having grown up in the era listening to New York legendary d.j., the late Frankie Crocker whose tag line was "if Frankie Crocker isn't on your radio, then your radio really isn't on".  Frankie Crocker was silky smooth and he had a way about him that captivated an audience, an audience whose intelligence he respected.  Every night at 8:00pm exactly (I've literally set my watch to this) he would sign off by playing the classic "Moody's Mood for Love", one of the greatest love songs of all time, which was probably his way of saying how much he loved the city that appreciated and loved him back.

While I respect the roles that nationally syndicated shows and their hosts play, and the good they do in communities across the country which include voter registration drives; health and wellness initiatives; and imploring people to action, I'd just like to see more local d.j.'s be proactive and responsible in honing their craft and respecting their listening audiences.  Don't leave it to the big boys to speak to and for your community, use your platform to invoke and enact change.  You have our attention so cherish and respect that.

So, that's Taraztake for today.  What are your thoughts?

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Exercising for the thinly challenged

Okay, so I've rededicated myself to working out in an effort to let my inner Beyonce body come out.  Now before you get all proud of me and say "yay Tara" or "you go, girl", I think you should know that I've been here before.  There were the 6:00am workouts; the marathon like elliptical sessions; the scary hip-hop class, that felt more like an audtion for a music video (it's also when I painfully discovered that all African-American women are not necessarily blessed with rhythm); and the five day a week strength training exercises, all of which have fallen by the wayside at one time or another.  And then came Zumba!!!

My love affair with this latin dance exercise class was developed after I had done some research to make sure that there weren't a ton of routines that required you leaving your feet (did I mention the scary hip hop class?).  When I figured that this wasn't just an exercise for skinny girls, I tried it.  In my opinion, the best thing about a good Zumba class is that the instructors give you the routine, but allow you to do it in a way that feels comfortable to you.   Therefore, those of us who may have a little more cushion than others, don't have to feel intimidated that we aren't doing it "right".  This could be the reason why each week I notice more and more of my fellow thinly challenged sisters and brothers taking the class.  What's also really cool about Zumba is that in addition to it being pure fun, you develop relationships with the people who tend to take the same classes with you each time.  My particular class is encouraging and supportive (including this wonderful woman in her 80's who never misses a session!), and when I miss a class I feel guilty, and miss them terribly.  Isn't that what a good exercise class should be about?

Now, I have a long way to go, and a lot of Zumba classes to take, before my inner Beyonce body makes her appearance, but I made a vow to myself that I will enjoy the journey.  And hey, if I ever want to speed up the process, there is always the elliptical machine!

So, that's TarazTake for today.  What are your thoughts?

Monday, September 27, 2010

What have you done for someone lately?

Recently I had the privilege to go to an event where educators and students were honored for their work in the community.  One young man, a college freshman, volunteered his time teaching Latino kids how to speak English and he mentioned that he is always looking for opportunities to help other people.  While I was inspired by his work, I must admit I was a little bit mad at myself becuase I'm more than twice his age, and I felt like I haven't done half as much.  The argument could be made that because we have a vast age difference, we have different priorities and responsibilities in life, but I think that's just an excuse.  We find time to do the things we want to do, so why can't we find that same time to bring joy to someone?

Whether it's visiting a friend in the hospital, buying a token gift, or just saying a kind word to someone, I have always been rewarded with a great feeling when I've put someone's needs ahead of my own.  But, if I'm being honest with myself, I do those things when it's convenient for me to do so, so is it really still considered a good deed?  I'm thinking not. 

After the recent passing of Yankees owner George Steinbrenner, a lot of the stories written were ones where he did something nice for someone that no one knew about but him and that other person (a story that comes to mind is that he picked up a huge hospital tab for a woman he barely knew with the condition that she could never speak about it.  She broke that promise after he died and I'm glad she did).  He also said something that really resonated with me: "if you do something for someone and more than you and the person you did it for know about it, then you did it for the wrong reasons".  Another quote I really like can be found in the mega bestselling book THE PURPOSE DRIVEN LIFE which says "that the greatest gift you can give someone is your time because its the one gift you can't get back".

So I'm going to heed this call and make more of a concerted effort to give my time and contribute to society in a way that uplifts and empowers my fellow brothers and sisters.  Won't you join me?

So, that's TarazTake for today.  What are your thoughts?

Friday, September 24, 2010

The J-E-T-S are a MESS, MESS, MESS!

Okay, I'm really going to step in the lion's den today as two people who are very close to me are die-hard Jets fans.  However, I'm going to have to risk it because the New York Jets are really starting to annoy me!

Being a born and bred New Yorker (shout out to Brooklyn!), I'm a die-hard Yankees fan (something that anyone who has ever had a conversation with me finds out in less than five minutes); I was a Giants fan (the conventional wisdom says that Yankee fans are usually Giants fans and Mets fans are usually Jets fans); I say special prayers for the Knicks, Nets and Mets; and I root for the Jets sort of the way you wish your little brother well in life.  However, I'm starting to think that the Jets are developing an inflated sense of ego. 
They had a great playoff run last year, coming one game shy of going to the Super Bowl, and they became the darlings of the N.F.L.  So when HBO's behind the scenes show "Hard Knocks" came calling, of course the Jets signed up. 

I really enjoyed "Hard Knocks" in the past so I was excited to see the Jets version and thought it was pretty good.  It was disturbing to hear how much gratuitous profanity that was bandied about on the show, and  I tried to brush it off and think that maybe that's how men in locker rooms talk  It then occurred to me that the main people using this salty language were the coaches themselves (someone please hand the loveable Rex Ryan a thesaurus so that he can learn to express himself differently).  I was also reminded how Christian coach Tony Dungy led a team to  champtionship glory maintaining grace and dignity throughout the process.  Therefore, I refuse to believe that men need to relate to each other in a profane way in order to be successful.

Something that I think a lot of reality television stars are coming to discover is that if you live by the camera, you must die by it also..  So with a bullseye now squarely on their back, and playing in the toughest media market in all of sports, everything the Jets do is going to be magnified.  So you would think that this would cause them to be on their best behavior.  NOT!

First up: demeaning a female reporter with catcalls and insulting remarks.    It was disturbing, to say the least, to hear how the players carried themselves around this woman, apparently led by the outspoken Kris Jenkins, who is one of the "leaders" of the team (maybe now that an injury has forced him out for the season, it will give him some time to reflect on ways that he can contribute more to the team than his mouth).  As an aside, and I don't want to get into blaming the victim here, but it wouldn't be a bad idea for this reporter to have a sit down with the Pam Olivers and Suzy Kolbers of the world to give her a lesson on how to dress in front of a football team, and how wearing skin tight jeans may not be the look you want to go for if you want to be taken seriously.  But, I digress.

Next on tap: the drunk driving arrest of Braylon Edwards.  I want to go on record as saying that I think that people who drive drunk are stupid.  Period, the end!  To knowingly get in a car while intoxicated is not only foolish, but you put unsuspecting others at risk.  Apparently Edwards was in the car with three other people (was he the less drunk of the four of them which is why he drove?) and no one thought that him driving was a bad idea??!!  What's worse is that the Jets have a program in place that allows you to call for a ride in cases such as these and he didn't make the call.  This guy's career has been resurrected more than Jesus Christ himself and he still doesn't appreciate the gift he's been given.  Incredible!

What's funny to me is that the reports in the New York papers yesterday had Rex Ryan telling his team that "enough was enough."  Maybe if he had spent more time in training camp talking to them about character issues then finding new ways to use the "F" word, he wouldn't sound so exasperated now.

Now as I said earlier, I root for the Jets because us New Yorkers (although they do play in New Jersey) must stick together, but just like that little brother, I want to slap them upside the head and tell them to GET IT TOGETHER!!!

So that's TarazTake for today.  What are your thoughts?

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Will this season mark the return of quality television writing?

In yesterday's post, I gave mini-reviews of some of the shows I had a chance to watch (other reviews will be forthcoming).  It was refreshing to finally get a look at some quality scripted dramas ("The Event", "Chase", etc.) and a really funny comedy ("Mike & Molly" - review to come) as opposed to all of the "reality" offerings that have seemed to overtake television programming.  Now don't get me wrong, I watch my fair share of reality shows as a guilty pleasure, but I long for the days of "The West Wing" (the episode "The Two Cathedrals" still remains in my mind the best hour of television writing I've ever seen in my life!), "Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip" (okay, so I'm an Aaron Sorkin devotee, what of it?) and others.  Do you remember where you were when you found out who actually did shoot J.R. Ewing?  Those are the television moments I miss.

What's starting to become troubling about these "reality" shows, is not only the sheer volume of them and the fact that they will make a "reality" show out of just about anything, but it is the way in which the producers seem to stage certain aspects in an effort to manipulate emotions from viewers.  While you couldn't make up the feud that was Jill vs. Bethenney on "The Real Housewives of New York" Danielle vs. everybody on "The Real Housewives of New Jersey", and the foolishness that can be found in the Atlanta offering, Bravo seems to delight in making sure that each season of their cash cow is more outrageous than the one before.

So I welcome this new television season with great anticipation, and so far I like what I'm seeing.  You can have your "Hair Battle Spectacular" "Jerseylicious" and "The Bad Girls Club", but me, I'll take Shonda Rimes, Tina Fey and the like over "reality" any day of the week.  Long live scripted television!

So that's TarazTake for today.  What are your thoughts?

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

The new Fall shows

Okay, I'll admit it, I'm super psyched asbout the new Fall season.  I can't wait for my faves like "Modern Family", "The Good Wife", "Grey's Anatomy" and "Brothers & Sisters" to return and I'm equally pumped about all of the new offerings.  So I put my trusty DVR to work this week to catch some of the new talked about shows and here is TarazTake on them.

"The Event" (seriously, how do they get that second "e" to go backwards??!!  It's just too weird) - 9:00pm Mondays on NBC

In a word: FABULOUS!!!  I was concerned that this show was going to be one of those that wouldn't live up to the hype, and boy am I happy that I was wrong.  As an avid watcher of "24", this show almost feels like a spin-off.  It is edge-of-your-seat suspense and it leaves you counting down the days until next Monday.  This is a show that grabs your attention and keeps it.  I am sooooo all in.  As Renee Zellwegger told Tom Cruise in "Jerry Maguire", "you had me at hello!"  If there is any negative here for me is that they have Blair Underwood playing a Cuban President who has no discernible Latin accent.  President Martinez has some "splanian to do!"  To close this on an upbeat note, it is so cool that they have so many veteran actors in the cast and I was especially happy to see Lisa Vidal as the first lady (I've been a fan of hers since her days on "New York Undercover").

"Chase" - Mondays at 10:00pm on NBC

I'm not familair with Kelli Giddish and her work, butr watching this show I kept asking myself: where has this girl been all of my life?!  She is perfectly cast as Annie Frost, the tough-as-nails U.S. Marshall who packs a mean punch.  The show is aptly titled as they are constantly on the hunt for serious bad guys and trying to anticipate their next move.  What's unique to me about this show is that the focus isn't so much on the victims but on the ones who victimized them, as Annie so bluntly put it: "the police care about where he's been, we care about where he is going".  The show has a very diverse and attractive cast, and with the genius that is Jerry Bruckheimer behind it, it is my pick for the sleeper of the season. 

"Detroit 1-8-7" - Tuesdays at 10:00pm on ABC

Okay, so I have to admit that I got caught up in the whole advertising line on this one "for those who loved NYPD Blue...", and since that was one of my favorite cop shows of all time, I had to give this a shot (plus, I wanted to show the city of Detroit some much needed love).  My thumb is kind of half way up on this one.  While I didn't hate it, it didn't knock my socks off either.  It's nice to see Michael Imperiolli be someone other than Christopher Moltisanti; to see veteran actor James McDaniel back on television (seriously, does he ever age?), and to see Aisha Hinds come from playing a recovering crackhead on "HawthoRNe" to playing a Lieutenant in charge (only on television, folks), but I'm going to have to give this a couple more episodes before I make a decision to keep watching this one.  I will say that there was an unexpected ending to the first episode that gave you hope that the season could be promising.

"Outlaw" - Fridays at 10:00pm on NBC

I have this crazy allegiance to Jimmy Smits that will make me watch him in everything he does.  I am so sad to say that I think this is going to be another short-lived effort (does anyone remember "Cane?").  Jimmy plays Cyrus Garza, a judge who decides to leave the Supreme Court to take on cases where there is perceived injustice.  He is doing this in part because he lives constantly with the memory of how he disappointed his beloved father, a respected lawyer, who died in a car crash where Cyrus was a passenger.  While this show offers the opportunity to have Cyrus try all types of cases in various cities, it doesn't set itself apart enough in any real discernible way that will make you think it has staying power.  This truly makes me sad.  However, my love and respect for Jimmy Smits and his work will keep me watching until the bitter end.

So that's TarazTake for today.  What are your thoughts?

Just Saying

Tara-z Take is a blog dedicated to the musings, clever observations and downright funny and honest opinions on all things pop culture, sports and daily happenings of the world.  Some of the things you can expect to read here are my take on movies and television shows (both scripted and "reality" - or whatever that means nowadays), my thoughts on rich people behaving badly, and last, but certainly not least because I'm an unapologetic, die-hard transplanted New York Yankees fan, there are sure to be regular thoughts on the most celebrated team in sports.